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Error #1: “Un cafe de mocha”

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“A mocha coffee” is what I WANTED to say but I said “Dame un cafe de MOCO”. This sentence caused a few giggles. Why? the word, “moco” means “snot” or “mucous”!

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Error #2:“Su Perro Juelle Rico” The word “perro” means dog and I wanted to say, “Your dog smells good.” (The dog had just come from the groomers.)

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But It sounded like I said “pedo” See, I am NOT very good at rolling my R’s.. so it came out sounding like “Su PEDO juelle rico,” which caused everyone to laugh. Why? Because Pedo means “fart”. Yep, I had actually said: “Your fart smells good!”

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Error #3: “tiene Sopa?” I was in the bathroom and I wanted to wash my hands, but we were out of soap. So I asked my Spanish-speaking mother-in-law “Do you have soap?”

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It took her forever to return! when she finally came back, she brought me a micro-waved bowl of soup. Why? (gulp) Because “Sopa” means “soup.” Soap to wash your hands = “jabon”

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Error #4: Estoy muy exitada! I said“Yo estoy muy exitada ser aqui.” in English: “I’m really excited to be here!”

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unfortunately! I should have said “Yo estoy muy emocionado ser aqui” Why? because “estoy muy exitada” translates to ... Ready? “I’m very horny being here!” Definitely Not good.

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Error #5 “Vamos a la casa” I wanted to show an attractive heavy-set woman a house, so I said to her, “Vamos a la casa” which means, “Let’s go to the house,”right?

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Except that I said cama not casa “Vamos a la CAMA” means “Let’s go to bed”. And I said it right in front of my wife too! The woman laughed it off, with , “Si, si, vamos a la cama.” I don’t think I’ve ever lived that one down!

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Error #6: The word “la Ballena” The word “la ballena” in Spanish means “Whale”. so “La ballena grandote” = huge whale.

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Two l’s in a word = a jay sound In places like Argentina and Spain, the double L sounds more like a “Jay” sound. Sometimes I do this thinking I sound cool So I said “La BAJayNA grandote”. say it now! When I said it, someone burst out laughing! They thought I said, “the enormous vagina.”

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Error #7 the word “Gangas” The neighborhood looked shady so I said “Hay gangas aqui?” Are there gangs around here?

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Gangas actually means coupons or “bargains” Not really appropriate when you’re in a bad neighborhood unless maybe you’re searching for a discount on some drugs or guns?! The word “Banda” means “gang” and “gangas” means coupons.

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Chicken and Kitchen Actually this one is a switch-up for my Spanish speaking friends. THEY get confused with these two words. For example, my friend said to me in English, “Hey, would you like to see my big Chicken?” I said “Sure.”

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Where’s the damn chicken? And he brought me to his big, modern Kitchen. “Well, what do you think?” he asked. I said, “It’s nice but..

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That’s it For Now Hope you enjoyed it! Share the giant vaginas and chickens with your friends and have a fantastic day! For more fun stories, check out

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